A verse that give me encouragement is: Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer.
I was scared-what is this going to look like? Can we do this, adopt? What will everyone think? But when we felt the confirmation from the Lord to pursue adoption, peace & joy took over me.
My dear friend Emily Baynes came over last week for coffee and she spoke such truth into my life. Her words were very gentle, kind and true, saying she knew this isn't the path that "I" would have planned for my life.... that yes I had always had the desire to adopt, but that "my" plan would have gone a little differently. I was so encouraged after having her over, it brought me joy to hear what she had to say.
In the big picture God is using this in our lives to bring us closer to him, glorify him, and that this journey in our life will bring others to find Jesus as their savior. Its not about me, or us, but its about Jesus.
Just as Jesus led the Israelites through the wilderness for forty years, he chose to not take Matt and I straight on the road of parenthood....as we would have wanted. Jesus took us on a different route, not a quicker, easier, cheaper, instant gratification kind of a route. But he took us on a route that has changed us in some incredible ways, weeding out more of the sinful flesh that we have, confirming our identity in Christ and changing us to become more like him. My heart throughout these years has softened, I have become more aware of those around me, and the desire to learn to love others as Jesus does. This really is the life he has chosen for us, this is the big picture.
